Vodka & Pancakes

the things I eat and the drinks I drink…a Louisiana blog


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Temaki…and Jazz Hands. And Recreational Drugs.

I can’t make fun of it because I genuinely love it.  But that said, it’s slow.  Like my dead grandmother slow.  Which is ok to say because she was mean as shit.  And didn’t like me.  Which is impossible.

Also, I told the owner it was my “favoritest restaurant of all time” and he wasn’t too impressed.  Like it was the 1,000th time he had heard that that day.

temaki

I always get the tomato miso soup because its ultra delicious in my tummy.  I wanted to take a picture, so I told my boyfriend to move his hands.  This is what I got.

temaki- jazz hands

Jazz hands at Temaki.

But my problem started when I walked into the Bearded Lady at 4:30.  Our two beers were $8.  My manfriend was like, “wow, $8 is really cheap.”  Is that what we have been programmed to think?  Eight dollars can buy me an 18 pack (if I’m getting all college style on your ass and get Keystone).  Anyway, we then hit the Usual then Temaki.  Apparently 5:45 is not an acceptable time for anyone under the age of 65 to eat, so we had to have a drink first.

Or several.  Thats how we normally do it.

usual

Afterwards, we went to the Chat Room, another mistake, as I currently have a monster fucking headache and am having to one-eye it to write this.  Anyways, I read online the Chat Room serves minors, but I didn’t see anyone other than us under the age of 40 there.  That said, some guy I unfortunately know walked up and joined us saying he was about to leave to go eat at Mijo’s (buy the Groupon!  It’s always there!).  He asked if after we wanted to come over for “some weed and coke if yall like to party” (I shit you not).  Is that a measure of how much you like to party?  I thought I liked to party, but am I in the baby party league?  Apparently so because I thought the most interesting thing about that sentence was the fact he was going to go eat at Mijos.

So as he left with my imparting words of ‘get the quinoa tortilla soup and dare to get off drugs’ (boom) I realized I guess I’m not a ‘cool’ partier.  When tortilla soup is more appealing than recreational drugs you are with me in the baby party league.

I’ll just stick with my 18 pack of Keystone.  God, I’ll never be cool.

 


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Concerns about Chick-Fil-A

Pros- it’s delicious.  Cons- everything else.

chick-fil-a

I’ll state the question that’s on everyone’s mind.  Why aren’t they open on Sunday?  I get that old guy is religious but I’m not and I would like to eat it on Sunday.  Chick-Fil-A is a  hangover go-to and Sunday is my hangover go-to day.  As is Friday apparently because I feel like shit but that’s  different story that involves a farmer’s market and a bottle of scotch.

And I think it’s creepy when people say “my pleasure”.  I know it’s not but it sounds sexual.  I don’t like it.

But all this is a moo point, as I am moving farfaraway from my beloved Chick-Fil-A.  And the only fast food around where I’m headed is a Church’s.  Honestly, I’ll have to stop drinking as I can’t chance the hangover and eating at a Church’s.

I already know I’m going to get a text from my boyfriend once he reads this saying “Jesus, you’re eating butter biscuits on a Friday now?”  My name isn’t Jesus but that’s what he calls me.  Anyway, Friday is the new Sunday.  Go eat at Chick-Fil-A.


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The Usual then Mijo’s & thoughts on why I’m lazy…

It’s been awhile since I updated this.  I kept telling myself I was “busy” but as someone oh so dear to me pointed out, I rarely am doing anything and was being lazy.  So I decided it was time to update.  And call that person an asshole.

Last night, the guy I live with and I went to a place over on Magnolia called Mijo’s. We originally went during lunch a couple weeks ago after remembering the restaurant is always on Groupon (doesn’t really seem like a  sound business plan) so we decided to buy $30 worth of food for $15.

the usual- french 75

Last night we went to go have a drink at the Usual (my fave, his least) and walked across the street to Mijo’s.  After looking on the app, my boyfriend sadly informed me that there weren’t any current Groupons for Mijo’s.  It might have been the look on my face (or the passive aggressive comment about how I couldn’t believe he was going to use a Groupon on date night) but I was then subjected to an informative speech about how Groupons are, in fact, not a representation of how much someone loves another person.  As I only half-listened I also recall something about being ‘fiscally savvy’.

Oh, romance…

Mijo- wine

But back to Mijo’s.  One exceptionally great thing about this place is that for $8, you get half a gallon of wine.  I used my hand as a point of reference but my boyfriend informed me that my giant man hands won’t give my bucket of wine the credit it’s due (I have little girlie lady hands, by the way).

mijos- wine 2

Several years ago, he gave me one of those wine glasses that holds an entire bottle of wine.  I like the concept but, honestly, if I’m in the mood that I need to put an entire bottle of wine in one single glass then I’m just going to cut out the middle man and go straw to bottle.

But again, back to Mijo’s.  It’s asian/mexican fusion so it’s confusing.  Plus I really don’t care for asian food so I might not be the best person to listen to.  The guy I was with loved it.  Walking the block to the restaurant, we randomly saw someone we know who said to get the lasagna.  So, maybe it’s mexican/asian/italian fusion.  And they have weird forks.

mijos- food

So in conclusion, I’ll go to Mijo’s for the wine.  My boyfriend will go for the food (look at his little girlie martini in the picture).

Get the lasagna…

 


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The Modern. And Ninjas.

I quickly snapped a picture of this giant piece of art/statue/sculpture thing outside the entrance.  I know you aren’t supposed to take pictures but it was outside and I was fast.  I ran inside before art protecting ninjas dropped out of the sky and stole my iPhone.

I ate here twice within the last week, once with my mom and once with my boyfriend.  I always get a vegetarian sandwich, which I think is good but, honestly, it is what it is, and usually have  glass of wine (two actually or if I have nothing to do then three).  That’s one of the benefits of working from home.  You can do it as drunk as you want.  Or not at all.  No one knows has any idea what you are doing.

My boyfriend didn’t understand the “lady portions” so it was a bit of a hard sell.


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Frankie’s. And Tigers.

Omnomnomnomnomnomnomnom I’ll eat nachos anywhere.

So when everyone was like, ‘hey, Frankie’s is opening in Fort Worth!’ I was like, ‘hey, I don’t give a shit’ because a place that serves frozen vodka red bull is a place I don’t need to frequent.  But they do also have nachos and even though they were gross, as I aforementioned, I’ll eat nachos anywhere.

So unfortunately I sat behind this woman and this tiger and he stare at me the entire time.

He tried to be subtle and hide but I could feel his judging eyes while I ate my nachos with a side of veggie burger.

When I finally escaped to the bathroom I found that Einstein and Chairman Meow also frequent this place.  It isn’t for the nachos so it must be for the frozen vodka red bull.


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So here’s what a bad idea looks like…

 

 

No thanks.

I like tacos.  I also know that tequila makes me mean as shit.  Had they left the sign with just ‘tacos’ my interested would have been peaked.  But tacos and tequila, well it’s just best for all parties involved if I stay home.

I’ll be there at 6.


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Fireside Pies & a shot of Patron. No thanks, I’m just going to go to bed.

Here’s the thing about Fireside Pies.  It’s delicious.  But here’s the thing about Patron.  It’s not.

 

My friend, who is a wine and liquor rep that I need to de-friend, and I were going to go to dinner.  So when she picked me up and informed me we had to swing by the bar for some coffee flavored Patron shots first I almost opened the car door and rolled out.  Would have been safer for me in the long run.

This is the same friend who three weeks ago, I passed out at 8am in her lawn til the sprinklers got me.  Same friend that two weeks ago her boyfriend had to carry her out of a party I hosted at my house by 8pm.  Like I said, de-friend.

We used to know this guy and when we would go to the bar, he would always make a big production and order everyone Patron shots.  Fast forward a year or two and I found out that every time he ordered shots, the bartender poured his as water.  Well, that guy sucks and we don’t hang out anymore.

But I learned two important that day.  One- don’t have sex with and not call back  the person you are depending on keeping your water secret.  She spilled and then informed him she had been charging him Patron pricing for that water all along.  Two- don’t fuck with that lady.

I feel like this is how they serve plates at Fireside because within seconds mine looks like this.   Honestly they could have served my plate like this because I had already had three Patron shots and I wouldn’t have known the difference.

This is one of my favorite places and I think the food is the most delicious food of all time.  Although, I used to really like this taco place but ate there sober one time and found that my tastebuds rejected it.  So who knows.