I went to a baby shower in Dallas the other day. As I sat between two pregnant girls, who also sat next to two pregnant girls, I began to contemplate my escape which towards the later part of the afternoon consisted of ways of faking my own death or just run screaming out the door. So as I bolted, I realized I needed a margarita.
So I had four. And some queso.
We went over to Fernando’s in Dallas’ Travis Walk area. But when girls in your group start co-mingling with the guys outfitted in wife beaters and white sunglasses at the table next to you…it’s time to go. I’m sure there were red flags before that low point (the girl next to me actually showed us her underwear at one point), but as I said, I was drinking margaritas and those flags went unnoticed.
That and I had 12 nachos to eat. Nothing can deter me when nachos are involved, I have the resolve of Gerard Butler in 300. I don’t give a shit who is wearing white sunglasses, I’m eating these nachos and gutting the fuck out of here.